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It’s Time to Get Rid of Emma Teitel’s Columns

Canadian columnist Emma Teitel created quite a stir last week with a piece titled “It’s time to get rid of Mother’s Day” in which the 27-year-old, self-identified Millenial Jewish lesbian advocates for a more-inclusive Guardian’s Day in its stead.

Both Mother’s Day and Father’s Day are extremely difficult for people who have lost parents or children, a reality that many who have experienced stillbirth pregnancies, for instance, have begun to write about openly in recent years. The gendered holidays are also generally a drag for non-binary parents who don’t identify with a single gender. Some of these parents have even begun advocating online for the creation of a brand new holiday to recognize parents who aren’t male or female. …

This is why I’d like to propose that we scrap both Mother’s Day and Father’s Day for good. And in the spirit of both inclusivity and selfishness, I’d like to propose a new holiday called “Guardian’s Day.” Guardian’s Day, which has a nice sci-fi fantasy ring to it, will be a rotating statutory holiday — meaning you can celebrate it any day you please, and you can interpret it any way you like. A guardian can be a mom, a dad, a non-binary parent, a grandparent, an aunt, an uncle, a pet owner, or why the heck not — somebody who takes really good care of his houseplants.

Conservative and pseudo-conservative writers tore into Teitel like she was the only bag of chips at a Super Bowl party, and rightly so.

From So, in order “to celebrate diversity and inclusivity,” normalcy is ignored and a very tiny tail (consisting of one student and its parents) now wags a very large dog (the rest of the school). Perhaps there should be no Christmas breaks because of one non-Christian student? Perhaps there should be no sports games because of a child with physical handicaps? Perhaps there should be no music classes because of one student who is hard of hearing?

A good argument, certainly.

From Perhaps I was too harsh before. I like Teitel’s thinking. In fact, I have a few other suggestions to make every major holiday more inclusive:

Change Santa Claus’ Gender & Sexual Orientation

The central character of the Christmas season, Santa Claus, is universally depicted as a jolly, bearded, elderly white male. Why can’t Santa Claus be a young trans lesbian suffering from a mental illness? We shouldn’t reinforce the idea that only benevolent white males are gift-givers.

Thanksgiving Should Be A National Day Of Shame

Thanksgiving is a holiday celebrating the invasion of Native American lands, as well as the subsequent mistreatment of the native peoples. Rather than Thanksgiving, Americans should hold a national day of shame during which white people reflect on the sins of their ancestors. The holiday would simply be called “Regret.”

A Holiday For The Obese

While we’re retooling holidays, why can’t we add some new ones celebrating lifestyles that are typically overlooked or even frowned upon. For too long, we have treated Obese individuals poorly, spreading the myth that diet and exercise will make them “healthier,” help them “live longer,” and allow them to “walk up a flight of stairs without needing to lie down for a nap.” How dare we. I propose a holiday celebrating the achievements of the obese. It would be called “The Fruits of the Fat.”

Even Milo chimed in on this one. I would be loath to quote him in any context, but I’m not above hijacking his list of curated social media commentary.

 It’s so ridiculous, it’s laughable — almost.

What conservative writers fail to acknowledge is the nature of her political views and her reach. First of all, she’s not a snowflake or a liberal. She’s a (((Frankfurt School Cultural Marxist))) passing herself off as the voice of the liberal left. Daily Caller writer Moses Apostaticus describes it aptly.

Believers in these doctrines of straight, white male oppression today call themselves liberals. This is a post-war fabrication designed to deceive everyday Americans about their revolutionary agenda. They are not liberals. They are Marxists.

Cultural Marxism is the Marxist dialectic fused with Freudian theory and applied to identity and culture. Like all forms of Marxism, it is based upon categorizing people into abstract groups and then creating a narrative of historical oppression between them. The strategy of Marxists is always to cultivate a victimized group and then convince its members that solidarity is required against the oppressors. This creates resentment and hatred and is how Marxist ideologies fulfill their revolutionary objectives. …

Marxism is always cloaked in high-sounding utopian rhetoric. This is a ruse. What cultural Marxists seek has nothing to do with true diversity, social harmony or universal tolerance. They don’t want the races getting along. They seek power. The solution for the perceived injustices that Cultural Marxists have manufactured is radical social engineering. The power to carry out this social engineering must be given, of course, to a politically-correct elite determined to remake society along ideological lines.

This is why cultural Marxists always seek to enter government, academe or influential positions in the media. In the process of remaking society, unsurprisingly, these Cultural Marxists gain enormous wealth, status and power. This is how careers and fortunes are made in the industry of grievance. It is also why Marxism is so appealing to the ambitious and unscrupulous.

And Teitel has certainly risen to prominence. She graduated with a B.A. in English and immediately got a position as a national affairs columnist at left-leaning Toronto Star, Canada’s largest newspaper. She says in her personal bio that her father is in publishing and that’s what inspired her to become a toxicity “journalist.” As a journalism graduate and former newspaper writer, I can tell you with absolute confidence that nobody just walks into positions like that without having prominent connections.

Now, she has garnered international attention. How long will it be before she guest stars on “Broad City”?

Meanwhile, if you think her call to abolish Mother’s Day is an outlier, think again.

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