The New Nationalist (TNN) is now set to award the Billy Madison Ultimate Insult Award for the most absurd story of the year coming out of the Lugenpresse.
To review, it was quite a contest in 2016, with the ludicrous Muslim demonization fiction story involving a epic ISIS dingy voyage going to the Daily Mail, aka the Daily Fail. Its cartoon-world headline at left was one for the ages. The scheme described here and dispensed to the dumb dumbs was that Muslim terrorists planned to take a small dingy 5,000 miles over open ocean to Indonesia, and then make it from there to Syria to fight for ISIS.
Yes, this year the Daily Fail wins again. In the runner up spot, the Fail stuck with their time-tested Muslim demonization buffoonery. Fail went with an all-about-da’-love theme, claiming that one “Susanne K,” a vaguely identified German woman (with no photo), hooked up with the brother of Anis Amri, the Berlin Christmas truck attacker. Susanne messaged condolences to Walid Amri “on Christmas Day,” two days after the event. One thing led to another and viola, the pair are now hoping to get married. Walid is said to call Susanne “my love” and is happy to adopt her children as his own. Naturally, they will live in Berlin. What kind of New Age hocus pocus is this?
For more on the Berlin Christmas truck attack, see:
Also contributing to our choice as the 2017 first prize winner is the Daily Fail’s fiction around Stephen Paddock, the alleged Vegas shooter. We have a feeling Paddock will be the gift that keeps on giving, so we will go ahead and present the award now. Why wait.
The Fail managed to locate one of Steve’s hookers, who gave them an ear full. First, we learn that Steve loved hard, violent sex (aka rape fantasies), “especially after gambling wins.” Paddock had also bragged about having “bad evil blood” from his criminal father. More on that in a second.
Elsewhere, we learn the hooker charged Steve $6,000 for her services! For those who haven’t seen Steve’s bro Eric and his incredible insights into the character, don’t miss this. Bro Eric is hereby awarded the Billy Madison Ultimate Insult award in the best Deception Actors category. When discussing Steve’s expensive taste in hookers, bro Eric offered us this little gem (satire ahead):
Some people need to remember that we don’t all work at Taco Bell. A $6,000 hooker for Steve would be like a normal person’s trip to Publix. That’s what Steve does. The hooker is usually comped though. Thousands of dollars in hookers. Steve actually paying for a hooker would be like the bug from Men in Black 3 wearing a Steve suit.
The 27-year-old hooker, who in typical Fail fashion was not named, described Paddock as “paranoid” and “obsessive” and said he ranted about conspiracy theories, including 9/11 being “an inside job.” Eureka! That’s the ticket! Explains why he opened fire on low-value, innocent country music fans.
What happened to the old days when high-value belly of the beast targets were sought? During the last several years, it’s been all about nobodies and targets that make zero sense in terms of giving up your own life. Why the stark change? Perhaps adding clues toward answering these questions, the ever vigilant TNN has birddogged a new factoid: Steve’s bad-to-the-bone father, Ben Paddock, had another name — (((Leo Genstein))). You can’t make this stuff up.
Absurd and insulting all the way around at the Daily Fail. Here’s this year’s award: