25 March 2022
BABYLON BEE — As The Babylon Bee faces its fifth day suspended from Twitter, users are increasingly being forced to get their fake news from a different source: CNN.
Indeed, sources from within the news organization claim they have seen an increase in engagement and impressions as satire-starved users have been forced to wean themselves off The Babylon Bee and follow CNN instead.
“Wow, we’ve seen a massive spike in followers!” said an excited Brian Stelter as he obsessively refreshed the official CNN Twitter account. “Dozens have joined in the last few days alone! Dozens!!!”
“Things are really turning around now!”
CNN immediately tried to capitalize on the influx of followers looking for good, comedic fake news by publishing an article on how Joe Biden is doing a great job and does not have dementia, a report on how World War III could have a negative effect on trans BIPOC representation in Netflix films, and an in-depth investigation into how many ice cream scoops Trump got as president. […]