31 July 2021
REVOLVER NEWS — Last week, a Revolver essay made a strong case that airports are the ultimate, hellish symbol of modern America. And they are a worthy contender. But they aren’t the best one. No, the most visceral, immediate way to witness the decay of 2021 America is to set foot into a popular amusement park. From Disney World and Universal Studios to Cedar Point and Six Flags, America’s theme parks may offer charm and exciting thrill rides, but they also offer a stark dystopian vision of how far America is from the great country it once was.
Sure, there are a lot of fat people in airports. But to stroll through a contemporary American theme park is to witness a blob of humanity in all its greasy, engorged, jiggling horror. 35+ BMI humans waddle about, gorging on funnel cakes, shaved ice, and the bespoke ice cream confabulations that are the typical fare of theme parks. Syrup and sugar coat the face, stick to the fingers, clog the arteries, and bloat the waistline.
In airports, the obese masses at least benefit from air conditioning, but in a theme park on a glorious summer day, their bodies will be coated in a generous lather of sweat, which will soak through their shorts and T-shirts, making them resemble wrappers at the fast food outlets they eat at 2-14 times a week. […]